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Happy​/​Sad: Lost Songs

by Owen Williams

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1.
Thoughts and feelings, cracks in the ceiling, Of my nervous heart. Changing choices, distant voices, Calling through the dark. Maybe I need you, and maybe I don’t, Maybe I believed in those stories of gold. The sirens are fading in my nervous heart, A sound that takes us back to the start. Changing faces, saving graces, Hidden in the heath. Falling water, creeping laughter, Hidden underneath, hidden in the sheets. And maybe I need you, and maybe I don’t, Maybe I believed in those stories of gold. The sirens are fading in my nervous heart, A sound that takes us back to the start. Thoughts and feelings, cracks in the ceiling, Of my nervous heart.
2.
Oh no, thank you, please, Just a pile of innocent leaves, That fell down to the ground, While no one was around. I’d chase your dreams to the highest hill, I’d chase your heart on further still, But my shadow gets lost when the sun goes down, The leaves from the trees on the frozen ground. But when the phone rang, I thought of her. When the blackbird sang, I thought of her. I saw the traitor hang, and I thought of her, I thought of her, I thought of her. You got a face like a magazine, And a voice like a flowing stream. You bring a spring to my step and sense to my head, Nothing is forgotten even when its dead. She got a baby in her belly and hope in her heart, Bring an end to the winter so the summer can start. For every friend there is a chair, To take your weight when you’re in despair. But when the phone rang, I thought of her. When the blackbird sang, I thought of her. I saw the traitor hang, and I thought of her, I thought of her, I thought of her.
3.
Here I stand, in a room, Like the old piano, I don't have a tune. Like the clouds, I sit and rage, A perfect age. Oh and I’d flee from desire, like a rat from the fire. Oh there was rain, before the summer came. Nervously I walk the bridge, I check the lights as I cross the road, Rain drives against the ground; I feel my legs collect the cold. Meanwhile the papers drive, the tired and angry herds, With perfect words. My thoughts ebb with the water, They go flowing through the gutters. Oh there was rain, before the summer came. Then the summer came.
4.
No man ever seemed to do me wrong, Still I found those summer days long. Living in my imaginary hell, A selfish man with a tale to tell. But I feel life flutter in my chest, The warm city wind blows as I catch my breath. And Everytime I think, Lord I get blown out the water, I don’t wanna pass this to my son or my daughter. Everytime I think, There aint no way out for me. So I find myself making my way, My plans nailed down tight and my hand on the key. But doubt comes calling like a lingering thief, Pulling at my heart and swaying my belief. And I’d sing like a bird released, I thought about that day and everyday since. And Everytime I think, Lord I get blown out the water, I just wanna feel all the things that I oughta. Everytime I think, There aint no way out for me. And when it happened I thought about it, oh no…. Everytime I think.
5.
I remember when you banged my head in to the window frame, And the lump on my head warned me not to do it again. At a time when there was nothing, no curtains, no veils or doors, Only what you choose or choose not to ignore. Don’t you die on the road, While you’re waiting for your life to unfold No not waiting for anyone to turn water to wine, And with no wonder waiting but the wonder waiting inside. Don’t you die on a road, While you’re waiting for your life to unfold.
6.
Jenny waited by the Cherry Station road Just as the trail had gone cold. And the old man, he did die, but with a smile on his face And we’d be lucky to share his fate. So take the mountain path that lays ahead of you my friend Kick away the urban decay on which you do depend Like the maid laying in the rain, loneliness in her bones Clutching at a photograph, 55 years old. Take the mountain road my friend And I will be there at the end Take the mountain road my friend And I will be there. All those little things that shave the odds against The thoughts keep stacking up like letters never sent And all those stricken souls, lying wasted by the road Do it for them. Take the mountain road my friend And I will be there at the end Take the mountain road my friend And I will be there.
7.
Done with mining, no more staking my claim, Done with mining, done with clearing my name. I’d swap the road, for the fields and trees, Let the sweet home grass, rule our wayward hearts. And I won’t exist, between the calendars and clocks, And there ain’t no man, would make me hold out my hand. I’ve been standing on the edge of what I want, Yeah I’ve been standing on the edge for too long. I finished my piece and I played my part, I promised my head would never rule my heart. Kicking my heels against the same old stall, Til’ I moved my head like a wrecking ball. Tired dreams travelling on a railway line, I’m done with that and I’m done with mining. Done with mining, no more staking my claim, Done with mining, done with clearing my name. So show me a door, and a clear blue sky, I’ll tear down the walls and leave the rocks where they lye. Let the love and the laughter, Linger on ever after. I’ll turn those stones and deny their health, I promised I would always be myself. Turn my track to my hearts desire, My head stays strong and my legs don’t tire. Turn myself to the river wide, When I die I will be alive. Done with mining, no more staking my claim, Done with mining, done with clearing my name. And it ain't about making a living. It's about living with all that you've made.
8.
Flu 03:56
Sweat pouring off my brow I think I’m getting ill, I’m tired of being tired; I’m bored of standing still. Me and my cuckoo, we go bouncing down the road, No he don’t talk that much but he aint fucking cold. What am I to do honey, what am I to say? What am I to do, when there’s something in the way. Oh darling, I think we’re coming down with something. The mirror’s getting lazy, everything’s hanging out, And when did we start keeping an elephant in this house. Been talking in my sleep, the devil’s in our bed, Your God he cam down, I took a hammer to his head. What am I to do honey, what am I to say? What am I to do, when there’s something in the way. Oh darling, I think we’re coming down with something
9.
Lost at Sea 05:34
Come all ye faithful, bitter watchers of the shore, Sending all your hopes down, down to the ocean floor. Sickness settles in your skin, it poisons like a bee sting, Your cries falling on deaf eyes, the water promises but never tries. And redemption, just a boat ride away. And when you watch the water, telling stories of me, I’m lost at sea. Oh home fires burn, and hope for a doubtful return, The moon tells the tide not to turn, and the heart refuses to learn. And redemption, just a boat ride away. And when you watch the water, telling stories of me, I’m lost at sea. Oh will I see, those merciful seas, bring you back to me. And redemption, just a boat ride away. And when you watch the water, telling stories of me, I’m lost at sea.
10.
The winds will stop blowing, poets put down their pens, The miners cease mining, for lovers and friends. And I will place you, on a raspberry throne, And I’ll sing to the world, When I marry my girl. The seekers will stop seeing, woods for the trees, Worriers won’t worry, doubters believe. In something you can feel, to the backs of your knees, A new day will unfurl, When I marry my girl. All the tears and the ex-loves, will be buried in the back yard, Of our house overlooking, the oceans and stars. And they’ll be no price, of sorrow or pain, Just diamonds an pearls, When I marry my girl. The fearful will be fearless, the wild will not be tamed, The gods will speak a language, that need not be explained. And the heavens will waver, rain come pouring down, The garden will grow, When I marry my girl. The people they will revel, a new king will be crowned, A queen to stand beside him, like the mountain unbowed. And I’d write a song, a thousand verses long, That I’d sing to the world, When I marry my girl.
11.
Stand in the street, stand in bare feet, Shouting and swearing at him. With blood on your face, he stands in disgrace, As you pull and you scratch at his skin. All the passers by, watch you beg, scream and cry, You punch, kick and lie in the rain. As the crowd gathers round, getting restless and loud, You’re taking turns fanning the flames. He pulls your hair, as you fall down the stairs, But it’s the look in his eye that really hurts. When the morning comes, and it’s all undone, Another tale of modern love at work. Holding on, to that first Spring song, When the Winter has long since set in. The heartless phone calls, the fists in the walls, A modern display of feeling. Cruel to be kind, drives you out of your mind, That modern love’s as hard as your heart, As night turns to day, and you walk away, From a young love doomed from the start. Oh we fuss and we fight, we do it all night, and then we do it again. But if you're right, and you're right, Then I'm out of my mind. But I know I love you.
12.
As we walk out of the store, I’ve no idea what we went in for but you’re certain, You know the colour of the money and the price of the curtains. And as we’re driving in the car, My worried mind curses my fragile heart and you know it, You’re making molehills out my mountains just to control it. Then we’re lying in our bed, All the thoughts are running through my head but I love you, I’m just consumed with my work and the mess in the bathroom. And the morning comes with a feeling, One little shove would send me reeling but you got the plan, Holding it there in the palm of your left hand.

about

The Happy/Sad sessions originally started back in 2006, with the intention of creating a fuller sound than the first album. I had no specific genre in mind but more blues style elements were creeping in to my writing and this influenced some of the techniques we tried on this record.

I had some fantastic people involved in the recording of these songs, which were inspired by bittersweet moments of life.

Unfortunately the album was never finished because of one reason or another and these songs were lost and forgotten for several years, until they re-surfaced when the studio they were recorded in was dismantled.

Following some encouragement, I decided to tidy them up as much as possible and release them, some 8 years later than intended. It's essentially a demo album but one that I'm happy people will get a chance to hear. It's dedicated to those who inspired those light and dark moments.

credits

released September 1, 2015

Matthew Boulter on backing vocals, guitar and bass.
Katy Ahrens on backing vocals.
Simon Gentry on harmonica.
Saffron Chant on saxophone.

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about

Owen Williams England, UK

Singer/songwriter from Essex in the UK. Acoustic based blues and gospel.

Released first album 'Routine Monsters' in 2009 and demo album 'Happy/Sad' in 2015. His latest album 'Standing Still Will Kill You' was released in 2017. Two new singles, Symmetry and There Will Be Blood were released in November 2018.

Influences include Bob Dylan, Nick Cave, Tim Buckley, Tom Waits and many more!
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